Let’s face it — you’re probably going to lose your 2021 NCAA Tournament pool. In fact, you’ll probably be out of the running before the end of the first weekend. It’s not your fault you’re terrible at picking games, though. Between all that’s going on in the world right now and trying to remember what channel TruTV is, you have a lot on your plate. But there are no excuses for having a bad March Madness bracket name. It doesn’t have to be the best, but if yours isn’t creative or funny, well, friendo, that’s on you.
Don’t worry, we’re here to help. Below you’ll find suggestions for most of the expected top-eight seeds, be it a pun based on the team name, the coach’s name, or a key player’s name. Picking Gonzaga? You could go from “Zags to Riches.” Better yet, if you go with Ohio State, you could be drinking “Bottomless MiMusas” at the end of the tournament. No need for a “Payday Lohner” if your BYU pick works out or to get involved with another “Pons-i Scheme” if your Tennesse pick pays off. In fact, you’ll be “Cade In Full” if you pick Oklahoma State and the Cowboys cut down the nets.
Some of those weren’t great, but we’re going to start “Gaining Mo’Mentum” when we get to Oklahoma and “Trendon Upward” with LSU. We also have you covered if you went “Out On Aleem” and picked Wisconsin or ignored the “Turgeon General’s Warning” and picked Maryland. You’ll look like a “Mensah Member” — and be “Kicking Aztecs” — if your pick of San Diego State wins it all, and if you like Virginia to win another title, you can say you’ve “Bennett There, Done That.” No one will be able to deny you have the “Primo Picks” if your choice of Alabama goes all the way, and you’ll truly be in a “Teague Of Legends” if Baylor dances to the title.
Hopefully these bracket names aren’t too much of a “Shaka To The System” (Texas), but we’re going to keep going “Hard In The Painter” (Purdue) so they’re “Served Up On a Santos-Silva Platter” (Texas Tech) for you. Clearly, we’re not afraid to “Mobley Go Where No Man Has Gone Before” (USC) with our suggestions. We have “Garretteed Satisfaction” (Kansas) for everyone, whether you expect to be “King Of The Castleon” (Florida) or finish second because you’re “Always the McBridesmaid, Never the McBride” (West Virginia). Either way, you’ll at least have a good bracket name. Sure, it’s “Slim Picketts” (Missouri) for some teams, but as you’ll see below, Iowa is the only team we struck out on … just kidding — “Made You Luka.”
By now, you’re realizing our success rate with bracket names is about the same as your picks, but “Zero Ducks Given” (Oregon) on our part — we have no shame. If nothing else, these suggestions will hopefully inspire your “Mad Sills” (Arkansas) to kick in gear and think of something better (which you surely can). After all, the best bracket names will be inside jokes or references so crude we can’t print them here anyway (just leave Sister Jean out of it, please!), so we can only help so much.
But there’s no need to “Curbelo Your Enthusiasm” (Illinois) about picking a bracket name. Just get “In The Izzone” (Michigan State), find “The Wright Stuff” (Villanova), and maybe you’ll hit a “Noles In One” (Florida State). Even if you arrive at a “Fork In Jerreaud” (Houston), just remember, you can come up with something that makes the rest of your bracket pool think, “That S*** Creigh(ton).”
OK, you’re sick of the puns. We admit, it’s “A Tad Much” (Colorado), but we do it “For Love Of The Game” (UNC). Let us have our “One Shining Mormont” (BYU). Our work is done. After all, “What More Do Juwant?” (Michigan)
Funniest, Best March Madness bracket names in 2021
Illinois Fighting Illini
Alabama Crimson Tide
Ohio State Buckeyes
West Virginia Mountaineers
Oklahoma State Cowboys
Florida State Seminoles
Texas Tech Red Raiders
San Diego State Aztecs
North Carolina Tar Heels
Michigan State Spartans
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